Forcing Out Kittens
by luminous carte
Summary: Dear Santa, this is Kairi. I hate my cat. Please take it away. Thank you! KY


Disclaimer: Feel like I'm doing a research paper... No, I do not own Kingdom Hearts. I write this purely for your entertainment and my enjoyment.

Forcing Out Kittens

…She was skipping out on her…

…_Again_.

It was universally acknowledged that when one, mainly Kairi, was in a foul mood, one has a bad habit of taking one's anger on an unsuspecting, uninvolved third party.

Last Christmas, Kairi was filled with a warm feeling burning and churning in the bottom of her stomach. That nice warm feeling was deep, unadulterated hate, further intensified by her, as she suspected, year old eggnog. Fortunately, true to her nature, she managed to dispel the churning feeling of the overdue eggnog all over Riku's lap, though the burning hate still festered

But why would she but upset during Christmas, even a year later? The answer was simple. She hated her cat.

Dark amethyst eyes narrowed under long, dark red lashes as her black tabby, dubbed Vincent, pawed at her pants leg, seeking permission on her lap.

"Nuh uh" Kairi exclaimed, hunching over her lap, effectively cutting off any access for the cat at her feet.

"You're not getting any love from me until you-know-who decides to wake to the real world and pick up her stupid cat!" Kairi cried, bringing her legs up to her chin and hugging them close with her arms.

Her head was still shaking in refusal, even as the cat made his, once again, solemn journey to the living room, resigning himself to another day with half the recommended cat chow and staring listlessly up at the ceiling.

They had that in common , the cat and her that is. But that was where she drew the line. She didn't even _like _the cat. In fact, she always wondered why_she_ even bought it. The tabby was kind of fat, had a white mark near its eye, which was supposed to be cute but only looked like an ugly deformed black eye, and white paws that _always_ got muddy and messy because the stupid thing always ran away from home at irregular intervals.

And really, she didn't always hate cats. Before she even came close to appreciating their useless existence. But now… she wouldn't hesitate to stick the nearest fork into Vincent.

Then again, Sora always used to tell her that she had a knack for misplacing anger.

--

A few minutes later found Kairi and the cat staring up at the ceiling, both overtly watching a spider on the ceiling and mentally debating whether the spider would scurry after them. Kairi hoped the spider would attack the cat. Vincent hoped the spider would eat Kairi, as physically impossible as that was, the thought made him happier, as she had still to feed him.

The TV was buzzing in the corner of the semi-spacious living room. The morning news was on, but Kairi was barely listening. It was the usual news about some out of control sale the day before, or Christmas joy, or charity or whatever. Kairi heard it a thousand times. Nevertheless, her ears were at constant attention, waiting for only one thing.

And a few minutes it appeared, ore more likely, sounded.

Kairi's eyes shifted from the spider as her ears picked up two words that made her heart beat with joy and anger.

"..the cat burglar…" Kairi sat up, raising the volume of the TV.

"…came last night, Christmas Eve, to this humble, apartment on the corner of Alexander and Ryder…"

Kairi sighed and stood up quickly, clicking the TV off with the remote control. She sported a heavy winter coat and reluctantly grabbed Vincent, placing him under her arm as she stormed out of her apartment.

She had to return the cat herself, it seemed

--

Kairi lowered her sunglasses, peering over the top, watching as the many nameless faces and bodies obscured her view of the entrance.

The airport was crowded, as usual and the security guard was giving suspicious glances towards her and Vincent.

"Freaking sweet! Just another hour and I'm going to be screaming 'Banzai!' in Wutai!" A very cheerful and very familiar voice stupidly exclaimed behind her. Kairi's amethyst eyes widened to large marbles before she spun around in her seat, coming face to face with familiar short black hair.

"Yuffie!" The figure in front of her froze.

"Looks like I found you, didn't I?" Kairi said barely suppressing her anger and outrage. So she was going to leave her! That lying, conniving….!

Yuffie slowly turned around, a cheeky, apologetic grin on her face. Kairi had a grim feeling the grin was due mainly to her getting caught then her intention of leaving Kairi without a word.

"K, Kairi… how did you know…"

"Well after I saw your little stint at Alexander and Ryder, I decided to kick back a few drinks with Riku, and now here I am," Kairi said between clenched teeth, giving a sickeningly sweet smile, not at all worried for Riku's well-being once Yuffie found out her friend squeaked her whereabouts, especially to her girlfriend.

"Weak man…" Yuffie muttered, shaking her head in disbelief. That is until Kairi stood up, the redhead's frame towering, no more like looming menacingly above her.

"Since you are leaving _Yuffie_…" Kairi started, putting as much hate, and no hurt because she was _not_ feeling any hint of hurt or betrayal, into her girlfriend's name. She didn't let Yuffie interrupt because the girl could sweet talk herself out of Satan's den.

"I just thought, being your caring girlfriend after all, that I should give you something you _accidentally _left behind."

Kairi dropped Vincent in a gaping Yuffie's lap, Yuffie still shell-shocked to even notice the extra weight. Kairi just pursed her lips. She wanted to say something else. She _really wanted_ to say something else. She wanted Yuffie to feel as bad she did at that moment. But nothing came to mind. Instead, Kairi just lowered her head slightly.

"Hope you have a very Merry Christmas in Wutai, or Midgar, or wherever it is you feel is better than me. Have a safe flight," Kairi said, turning around and walking slowly, excruciatingly slowly, towards the exit. She didn't want Yuffie to catch up to her, but she also did not want to look like some sobbing, needy poor girl in distress. She was better than that. Just give her a glass of non-spoiled eggnog and she would be just right the next day.

As soon as she was breathing fresh air, slightly put off that Yuffie had not in fact attempted to come after her, she realized the upside to all of this. At least she had gotten rid of the cat, all the cats, in her life. And she had placed her anger with the right person for once. Merry Christmas to her!

**The End. Merry Christmas!**

_Okay, so it's _after_ Christmas, but it still counts. In my books, still counts. This was mainly a challenge from my two friends, _**SharpieI**_and _**Like-Vines-We-Intertwine. **_Please read their stories, they are two beautiful, talented writers and they make me laugh like I'm five-years-old again (I'm not, or else I wouldn't be reading what I do read!).__So yeah, please read their stuff (they have challenges too)._

_ I hope the story is understandable. Yuffie is, in fact, the cat burglar on the news who is very involved with her, er, profession. Kairi is her girlfriend of one year, who, fed up with Yuffie and her job, breaks up with her. And Vincent is supposed to represent Yuffie and the way Kairi treats him is just a show of how Kairi misplaces her anger, abusing the cat when she is really just mad at Yuffie. Sorry if I made it seem like Yuffie is a b-tch or really mean. I don't think I represented her feelings behind this (after all this is about Kairi) but she's just too involved with her job to realize her life outside of her job, which is the main reason why Kairi breaks up with her. Think of how some cops or doctors are "married" to their job, though her profession is not as... lawful? So I hope I cleared up everything. Please review, it's the perfect present. Don't have to wrap it up or anything. _

_Also, I have always wanted to put one up for my deserving readers who review and make me smile and remind me to get off my butt and upload: Thanks board!_

_So, without further ado, thank you ** Koki-Chan,**** Metal Chocobo****, Elentaria,**** anesthetic relief****, meeshee****, DraugDae****, deviantFan****, watercali****, chibichoco****, jemshell****, Dun Dun Dunnnn****, VenixOfDarkness****, Triple V****, Momo-Chan.** Again, thanks for your reviews. I really do appreciate them!_


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